On my To Be Reviewed Stack!

On My To Be Reviewed Pile!

Saturday, July 13, 2013

When do children lose their innocence?

Is it in tiny increments?

Is it all at one time?

I have made quite an effort to keep my children sheltered. There are reasons, both good and bad about doing this.  

I grew up terrorized by classmates.  I don't want that to happen to the boys.  Kids pick on other kids for anything as stupid as having red hair, much less children with anxiety and autism, and who's behavior isn't quite the same as peers.  I have been vigilant in addressing anything I think is bullying.

The last few days, I've been getting snippets from Jamie.  He's afraid of looking stupid.  He's afraid people will make fun of him.

It's driving me crazy.  He's 8.  He should be enjoying dressing up like a cow for Chick-Fil-A Day.  Not worrying if people will think he looks stupid.

I hate that the world has turned my beautiful, innocent babies and are slowly turning them into cuss-word-hearing, self-doubting children.

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

The life and times of a stressed out momma

My life was alot simpler a year ago.  

I was planning the summer of fun with the boys.  A chance to reconnect with them, and spend time with them.  Try to be the kewl mom again, show how fun I can be.  I dyed my hair pink.  Took them to the pool every week, let them be a wizard with Harry Potter.

This year, I have a dad with terminal cancer, who has spent the last 2 months in hospitals and rehab.  Who was released last Tuesday, to be admitted back to the hospital with kidney failure less than 48 hours later.  He got out of the hospital Sunday evening, and again barely less than 48 hours later, he's being admitted for renal failure again.

We had to finally break the news to the boys tonight that he has cancer.  That's why he's been in the hospital so much, and why we'll likely have him in and out of the hospital all summer long.  Maybe it will make them more patient with our having to run around doing errands for my dad and step-mother.  

But we can't hide it any longer.  They need to know.  We need to start preparing Iain for the loss of his Pop. Pop had lunch with him every day for the first 4 years of his life.  And most of the first 3, he spent curled up in Pop's lap.

And now I'm trying to run a business at the same time.  Trying to make money for my family.  Trying to find something to keep me sane in the midst of all this calamity.

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Be careful what you post

There's a big hoopla going on in the blogging world amongst the women bloggers about a recent article in the Wall Street Journal, by a female, about how women use conferences as an excuse to get out of the house and party and tie it up in a pretty ribbon, saying it's work.

I know female bloggers.  I know how hard they work. I know they work almost 24/7, interacting with readers, creating relationships with other bloggers and media organizations.

However, the women bloggers do seem to bring this on themselves.  

Have you been on twitter during BlogHer?  For an entire weekend, the twitter-sphere is inundated with bloggers talking about how so and so is feeding them free breakfast and lunch, and dinner. So and so is giving them sodas and food. And don't forget the whole Chris Mann thing, where women were raving like lovesick teenagers over him and he's making a living going to women's conferences to perform for women.

Every company has a hotel suite where there's a party that everyone attends to pick up swag.  They go on and on about all the swag they get.  They even have giveaways after the conference giving away some of the swag they got because it was so much.

While you may make those contacts during the conference.  You network with companies and other bloggers...  YOU make it sound like a 4 day party where you are pampered the whole time.  You make it sound like a party vacation.

I won't pretend to act like men are saints at conferences.  That men don't drink the whole time. That men don't use it as an excuse to get laid. 

BUT, they're not tweeting about being drunk, being wined and dined, partying all weekend.


Wednesday, April 24, 2013


Time is one of those subjective things.  At times time moves so slow you don't think you'll ever get what you're waiting for.  At other times it moves so fast you don't have time to blink before it's gone.

When I was pregnant, time moved so slow.   A nine month pregnancy felt like 2 years.  When I was in labor, time moved even slower.  Since the time the boys were born, time seems to have flown.  It seems only yesterday I was holding and cuddling them all night.  Now they're about to graduate 2nd grade.

When my Mom died, all I could do was lament that I didn't have time with her. I didn't have the time to tell her I loved her.

Now my father is dying.  We were promised anything between 2 months and 5 years.  We knew we didn't have much time, but we had time.  Time for us to say goodbye, make memories, one last trip to Disney, time for the boys to understand what is going on.

On April 1st, my father found out he had Stage 4 Colon and Liver cancer.  He went in for surgery on April 11th.  He's now battling for his life because he caught an infection in the hospital.  In 23 days, we've gone from having forever with my father, to the possibility that any day could be his last.

Where is this time we were promised?  I can't even complain it went by too fast, because we haven't had it!  I'm struggling with how to explain it to my boys who are completely devoted to their grandfather, and he them. I thought we'd have more time for memories, for explanations, for telling each other we love them.  That time is fading fast.

For my father, I'm sure he's thinking time is moving incredibly slowly. He's in so much pain, I'm sure he wants an end to the suffering.  For the rest of us, time is moving way too fast.  He's slipping away too quickly.  I still have tons of things to say before I say goodbye.

If only this could be one of those times when we could slow down time.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Book Review: The Nortorious Lady Anne by Sharon Cullen

Title:  The Notorious Lady Anne
Author:  Sharon Cullen
Publication Date:  February 11, 2013

Book Description
Nicholas Addison, celebrated captain of the Blackwell Shipping Fleet, has agreed to take Mrs. Emmaline Sutherland aboard the Pride and ferry the raven-haired beauty across the Atlantic on what he imagines will be a routine trip. But when the ship is attacked by pirates, the seemingly innocent passenger is revealed to be none other than the infamous marauder Lady Anne, whose name strikes fear in the hearts of sailors everywhere—and whose seductive wiles commandeers Nicholas’s affections.

Lady Anne, a legend of the high seas, has spent the last eleven years plotting revenge against her father, the owner of Blackwell Shipping. She’s targeted the Pride in hopes of plundering its captain’s company secrets. But beneath her fierce courage and bitter determination, Anne has the delicate heart of a woman—a heart that cannot help falling for Nicholas. Now Anne must make a difficult choice: bring down Blackwell or surrender to love.

Book Review:  5 out of 5 stars
This book is the book I've been searching for for over a year.  A good old-fashioned bodice ripper, but with an actual story!!

This novel takes twists and turns, as a reader, you're taken for a bit of ride, trying to figure out where it might be going, what the answers may be.  The great thing about this story, for once BOTH the hero and heroine have issues in their past.  Both have demons to overcome, both are proud, both are determined to do "what's right."  Both struggle with their decisions, the doubts on what they "should do," and the lives growing further and further entwined.

This novel was immensely enjoyable.  I spent every free minute reading this book, and waiting for the happy ending.  Waiting for two stubborn people to realize they belong together. Waiting for them to jump each other.

As someone reading romance novels for 20+ years, this story had everything I wish stories nowadays could pull off.  A real story, a real dilemma, strong personalities that aren't just thrown together to try to pad out a book.  And sexual attraction. Loads of it.
Ms. Cullen has brought back the "golden age" of romance novel writing, and I am a definite fan of hers, and would love to read anything past and present I can get my hands on.



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